eyelessinlima.com ...handwriting on the wall... "All hope abandon, ye who enter in!"
09/07/2024
Rumor has it that Trump and his clone are taking their
act on the road. Trump, who talks out of both sides of his mouth, favors a ventriloquist act, which they have agreed to call Sid Pro-Kwo and (his dummy) I.V. Effe.
Egs:
Sid: I.V., why does the chicken cross the road?
I.V.: I guess to get to the other side.
Sid: No, no, no! To buy cheaper eggs, you peckerwood!
I.V.: Oh, I get it! The inflation thing...
Sid: It's the agronomy, stupid!
I.V.: Har, har, har, har!!! Why aren't the others laughing,
Mr. Sid?
Sid: Anybody that doesn't laugh at my jokes is human scum!
I.V.: Am I human scum like the RINOs are?
Sid: Not as much, I.V. You're not human. And you got a
sense of humor, like me.
I liked your joke about the "cat ladies."
I.V.: Was that the greatest joke in history, Mr. Sid?
Sid: No.
It was amazing though. But the greatest joke in history is the January 6, 2020 tourist visit to the Capitol. It scared the shit outta Mike Pence, but now, he gets a kick out of it.
I.V.: Who's Mike Pence?
Anyway, that's the way it goes (first your money, then your
clothes). The act should be a riot! Especially after the election. The QAnon Shaman is outta the joint, so that should come in handy. He's good for a laugh or 2, or a coup de etat.
You might be wondering about the drawing on the right. That's an architect's conception of what Trump's presidential library might look like. It'll be a two-holer. His "Greatest Speeches" will be tacked to the right hand side wall, written in felt marker (or crayon). On the left corner will be an altar with a miniature of "The Golden Calf." Classified documents will be on the left in a drop-box. Portraits of Putin, Kim Jong Un, Netanyahu and Xi Jinping will be hung on the back wall. Nicolas Maduro gets honorable mention.
The location is under discussion, but it will probably be on a golf course at Mer-de-Limbo.
Entrance fee is $10; toilet paper is $1 extra; otherwise use Classified Documents or "launch codes."
A fund raiser will follow the Grand Opening, at $20K a plate. Bring a dish. Cash bar.
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